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How to Handle Stressful Family Holidays

Resilience + Clarity

I don’t know about you, but my biggest issues come up with my family. I thought I’d share some tips I use during the holidays and scripts you can use both during and afterwards to help make things easier.

First Thing First

Gratitude helps a whole bunch. There is so much in my life to be grateful for no matter what is going on externally:

Especially in these times of such global unrest, I’m grateful for clean air, clean water, safe neighborhood, secure home, access to multiple media sources, the right to express my opinions, freedom from violence and fear, access to organic food and myriad food choices, clothing I love, books and movies to entertain me, music that feeds my soul, online and in person friends, online groups to support me, the beauty of this wondrous planet, and access to my inner world and spiritual guides.

How about you? It really helps to spend a few minutes in gratitude every day, throughout the day, to put family energies in perspective.

This practice is especially helpful if you are alone or missing loved ones who aren’t with you. Hold them in your heart and they can be with you when you think of why you love them so much.

 

Emergency Actions

When they are really working your nerves and you need a break before you blow up or cry or dive into the despair of self hatred – here are a few tips.

  • Have an emergency song that you can listen to that always calms or inspires you. Free by Stevie Wonder is one of mine.
  • Have an emergency mantra – mine is everything’s going to be alright, hearing Bob Marley sing it.
  • Take a deep breathing break – slip in the bathroom, close your eyes and take 3 deep breaths so your belly fills up, let it out with a sigh. Stretch a bit while you’re doing this, if you’re tense.
  • Detach – you are not your family’s thoughts, feelings, politics or money issues. You are a magnificent divine being in a little body for a short period. This too shall pass.

 

Scripts to Read

At the beginning or end of the day, I ask for help all the time from my soul and my spirit guides in the form of little scripts or statements – sometimes they are like prayers, sometimes I am declaring a state for my reality that’s in contrast to what I’m experiencing in front of me.

For instance: when your family is watching news programs or discussing politics diametrically opposed to your beliefs:

I am that I am (this calls in the power of your soul). I ask that I am shielded from the energy of these exchanges. I set the intention that I am filled with ease and joy, content with my beliefs. I release and allow my family members to choose their beliefs without affecting my peace of mind.  The world is filled with choices and options; I ask for the grace to let them be as they are and ask for comfort and support in loving and accepting myself just as I am right now.  May Grace bless this space for us all.  

When you’re feeling bad about yourself (this is huge for me – after a few hours with my family, I always think I’m mentally ill, no matter what’s going on).

I am that I am. I call upon all of my spirit guides, angels, soul and divine help to help me remember that I am blessed, filled with light, capable of great love, and have myriad gifts to share. Please help me let go of the feeling I am deeply flawed, move away from self hatred, and close the door on these inner voices, these critics that will not give me peace. I ask to be surrounded in light and love and self acceptance and that it remains unceasingly and continuously in place throughout the rest of my time with my family. Help me please, I am most grateful for the help and comfort. 

Blessing and Release Message from the Archangels

I leave you with a brief blessing from the Archangels, may it fill your heart with ease.

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